No More Putting It Off Until Later: “Timely Talk” Workshop Equips Parents With Anti-Procrastination Toolkit

Many parents have felt the stress, anxiety and tension brought on by the procrastination of their teenagers and anyone in this phase of life and parenting is not alone. The topic was timely for the St. Stephen’s Health and Wellness team who recently hosted a popular lunch hour “Timely Talk” parent workshop in hopes of providing effective strategies to help their students break the habitual procrastination cycle. 

During the session, Head Librarian Michelle Andrews and Middle School Counselor Tania Gil shared the psychology of why people procrastinate and how that relates to teenagers. Gil shared that many people delay hard tasks because they want to avoid them emotionally.

“Perfectionists want to make sure they don't disappoint,” says Gil. “Procrastination becomes a crutch so they can deflect blame if they are disappointed in themselves. They tell themselves ‘I'm just going to wait, wait, wait, and then I can blame that I just didn't do it on time, or I didn't spend enough time," Gil explains.

Both Gil and Andrews also offered actionable tips on how to support and help children break free from their procrastination habits. 

“When you feel like procrastinating ask yourself why?” said Gil.

Gil described these feelings as triggers and said that identifying how you feel about the task you are putting off is key to overcoming procrastination. In the same manner, parents should help their teens identify what might cause their procrastination, talk through the feelings they are having about the task or project and help their children use intrinsic and extrinsic motivation tools.

 

Andrews highlighted the pitfalls of making your child’s procrastination an issue between you and the child. Instead, Andrews suggested shifting responsibility by saying, “We both know you have that assignment coming. I trust you've got it covered.” They may fail to follow through but she stressed the importance of focusing on the trust factor that they will solve and letting them know you are available to help. 

“Saying ‘If you're not feeling good about it, let me know if I can help you figure it out’ feels so much better and de-escalates the situation that could become very stressful really quickly,” said Andrews. 

 

Sometimes a parent’s physical presence can be the trick for a child feeling overwhelmed about getting started. Gil shared it may help to invite them in the kitchen while you do the dishes or in your office where you are doing your own work. “You don't necessarily have to stay with them and watch them do everything,” she stressed “You can just be nearby.”  

Here are more quick tips for parents which have also been shared with Middle School students to help them break debilitating procrastination habits.

The recorded session has been emailed to all parents.

All parents are encouraged to join in person or online each month for the Timely Talks series.
Click here to view the full schedule and upcoming topics for the 2024-25 academic year.

The next Timely Talk workshop for Upper and Middle School parents is on November 14, 2024, at 11 a.m. in the Spivey-Schenk Room (in the back of the Dining Hall) or join via Zoom. St. Stephen’s Counselors Tania Gil and Jennie Kim will be presenting on “The Need for an Empathy Revolution.”